last beautiful girl

‘I am not afraid
Of anything in this world
Theres nothing that you can throw at me
That I haven’t already heard.’

That’s from one of my favorite u2 songs.
Bono is by far the best songwriter of our times. Anyone who disagrees is a moron.
And any musician who doesn’t listen to u2 (and/or the Beatles) wouldn’t know a good song if it hit him on the head.

I just got a new book. Therefore this blog.
It’s a book about Bono, the closest hes gotten to writing an autobiography. It’s a book that I initially wanted to get when we went on our honeymooney. But I didn’t get it.
And its been haunting me since.
Hina asked her baaji to get it from the states, and her baaji came back yesterday. And so did the book.

YAY !!

I finally gave hina her birthday gift. A month late.
But it went off well. She seemed happy.
I baked her cookies too.

And along the way I realized I can’t bake. I was really unsure and uncomfortable. Which is a sure sign that I can’t become a baker.
Its always good to learn these things about yourself. Now there’re two things I can’t do.
I can’t bake and I can’t write a book.

I’m quitting my job of almost 4 years today. I hope it goes off well.
I plan to tell my boss sometime during the day (once he comes in). Whats a good time to do something like this? As soon as he comes in? or When the day is over?
Is it better to let someone down at the start of the day? Or at the end?

If I were the boss, I would prefer the day. When its still sunny outside. Evening time would just depress me further.
In any case. Today is the day.

Heres how it should go (if it goes according to plan).

Ali: Sir, do you have a minute? I’d like to talk to you.
Boss: (silence)

[ awkward moment 1]

Boss (turning around on his chair): Haan Ali- Bolo…
(I grab a chair and sit down.
During this time hes already figured out what I’m going to say)

Ali: Sir, as you know I’ve been juggling my own design work and this job for some time now* …
Boss: (Silence)
Ali: and I feel its time that I start focusing on my own work a little more…

Boss (nodding): (Silence)

[ awkward moment 2]

Ali (having to improvise for lack of speech from the other end): So im obviously around until whenever…

From here on the conversation can go many ways.

I can think out all the conversation snippets in my head. And oddly enough I know his dialogues better than I know mine. I can think of tens of things he would say. I cant think of a single response I would give.

I feel I know my boss pretty well. And I don’t think he’s capable of surprising me anymore. But that’s the fear. What if he does?

I hope he doesn’t ask what I plan to do. (which is one thing I’m sure he’ll ask)
I’d love to say I have no idea. That I just want to move on. How, I don’t know. Yet.

Misbah---are you enjoying this?

I’m taking the leap. I get excited just thinking about it. Ive been in sort of a rut, creatively, I feel. This just might kick start me.
My songwritings been dead for way to long. I’m writing crap when I try.
I’ve all but stopped painting, even though I have two huge canvases to work on.
But now I feel energized again.

How exciting!

Complacency will kill the artist.
Sort of like what curiosity does to cats.

Wish me luck.


*this all important intro-sentence was provided by my wife. I think it works rather well.